


A Dangerous Affair

by Megara09



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Enemies and Lovers, Enemies to Lovers, F/M, Force Bond, I had such a blast writing this, Post-TLJ, Secret Relationship, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-11
Updated: 2018-02-11
Packaged: 2019-03-16 20:35:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 15,838
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13643964
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Megara09/pseuds/Megara09
Summary: They know it’s dangerous. They’ve almost been caught dozens of times, either outright or in their tangled lies. - In which Kylo and Rey can't quite let go of the hold they have on each other.Prompt fill for the More Than Love: RFFA Valentine's fic Exchange 2k18."Rey and Kylo have a complicated relationship, meeting in secret, and neither quite able to quit one another despite recognizing their lives would be much simpler if they could. They're both playing a dangerous game and they know it. (Optional: Eventually, Rey becomes pregnant and must figure out if she wants Kylo in her child's life - or if she even wants the baby.)"





	A Dangerous Affair

**Author's Note:**

  * For [AceQueenKing](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AceQueenKing/gifts).



> AceQueenKing, I really hope I fulfilled your prompt! I had an absolute blast writing this!

They know it’s dangerous. They’ve almost been caught dozens of times, either outright or in their tangled lies.

The Supreme Leader of the First Order is afforded very little privacy. The honor guard insists that it’s for his own protection, but Kylo knows better. Hux is playing the long game. He wants to know Kylo Ren’s every move so that, one day, he can be one step ahead.

Too bad for Armitage Hux that Kylo Ren was raised by a politician and knows better than most how to avoid such traps.

Every few weeks, he takes his personal shuttle out, alone, for three days. He never plans the timing, just comes whenever she calls.

It’s better that way. Less predictable.

But Kylo knows that it’s only a matter of time before they get caught or come to their senses. You can’t carry on an affair with the last Jedi apprentice in the entire galaxy without eventual repercussions.

She’s like the most addictive of Spice and just as hard to give up.

He sits anxiously at his desk, knowing that she’ll send the call out any day now. Just like every other time, he’ll drop everything and go.

It’s just the way they work.

*****

Rey has long since stopped pretending that she has any clue what she’s doing. All she knows is that she can’t let him go. She’d thought that it had been the end of things, when she’d shut the door of the _Millenium Falcon_ and watched him fade from sight.

It would have been easier if that had been the case.

Instead, she had barely gone a week before she’d reached out to him in a moment of weakness. She’d been on a solo mission on a mid-rim planet when a holovid of Supreme Leader Kylo Ren had begun to play nearby. She’d gazed on the tiny pixelated likeness of his face and had the sudden _burning_ need to see him in person.

Tentatively, Rey had cracked open the mental walls she’d been hammering into place since she’d last saw him. Her first sense of him had been his shock; a moment later, he’d barrelled into her mind and growled, _“Where are you?”_

She’d been helpless to deny him.

Less than a day later, Kylo Ren had arrived on a nondescript shuttle. Unmistakably First Order, but not ostentatious enough for the Supreme Leader.

He’d found her almost as soon as he’d landed, and they had wasted no time in coming together in a flurry of ripped clothing and half-hearted threats.

It was hard to take him seriously when he said that he was going to kill her while he was buried to the hilt inside her.

It was equally as hard to believe Rey when she said she’d drag him back to the Resistance when she could barely keep her eyes open from the overwhelming sensations of being joined so intimately.

From that first meeting, they’d been addicted.

Their...relationship...is not perfect. They bicker constantly, over everything. From Rey’s eating habits to Kylo’s wardrobe, to the more heavy topics like _you tried to kill my best friend_ and _you blew apart my ship_.

Things were easier when they met outside of battle. At those moments, it was purely sex.

At least, it was at first.

Eventually, they begin to linger. A few minutes longer of post-coital bliss. Extended conversations past the initial exchange of locations.

Even their battles - when facing each other across enemy lines - were more foreplay than war.

Shaking her head to clear her thoughts, Rey sighs as she taps a new destination into the nav of the X-wing. Time to go make a new mistake.

*****

She lands the X-wing in a field as far from town as she can while still being in range of the city’s comms. She’d had to make multiple passes over the area to find a space large enough for his shuttle.

Even now, months into whatever they have, she hesitates to call him. The emptiness in her core and the ache in her heart finally convince her to open the bond.

She’s tentative with it, having been blasted by his fury at an inopportune moment too many times. This time, though, he’s alone, _waiting_ for her.

 _“Where are you?”_ he demands as soon as the connection is forged.

_“Bazaar. About two klicks from the main port city.”_

_“I’ll be there in six hours.”_ Silence crackles between them before he adds, _“Do you want me to bring anything specific?”_

Rey grins, a memory tugging at her. _“More blankets this time would be nice.”_

 _“How was I supposed to know that place didn’t have any?”_ he defends petulantly.

Laughter echoes over the bond as Rey replies, _“It was a_ hostel _, your highness, not a hotel. We’re lucky they had sheets on the bed.”_

His annoyance washes over her like a wave, but Rey pays it no mind. She can deal with such a mild emotion. Rey settles into the pilot’s seat more comfortably as she waits for him to be on his way.

When he finally says to her, _“I’m coming for you_ ,” Rey can’t tamp down the shiver of anticipation. When she’d first met him, Kylo’s words would have filled her with dread and horror. Now, they make her stomach clench with _need_ and she grows wet between her thighs.

She shifts in her seat and presses her legs together in an unsatisfying quest for friction. When her fingers drift to the crux of her thighs to relieve some of the tension, Kylo’s anger whips at her.

 _“Don’t you_ dare _,”_ he snarls at her.

Rey whimpers but obeys, hating herself all the more for giving in to him. Her hands grip the armrests tightly, counting down the hours until he’s there with her.

Somehow, she falls asleep.

Hours later, she wakes to the feeling of arms surrounding her, picking her up. She startles awake, but relaxes when she recognizes him. Rey lies to herself, reasons that she must have felt his Force signature and knew who he was.

She can’t bear to know that she recognized his arms around her, the scent of him as her head rested on his chest. It’s too personal, too intimate.

She lets him carry her to his shuttle, to the small bedroom at the back, to the bed with black silk sheets.

Kylo lays her down gently, but what follows is anything but. He rips the clothes from her, and Rey is thankful that she’d skipped wearing underwear that day. There are red marks on her skin where his fingers drag too roughly, where his teeth leave love bites.

Rey relishes the heat of his hands, of his mouth, as he disrobes her. Once naked, she takes the lead and pushes him back. She’s glad that he leaves his helmet off for these encounters, usually tossing it into his seat as he leaves the cockpit.

She hates the stupid thing, but he likes the anonymity it gives him when he wants to go unseen. The galaxy knew Kylo Ren, masked figure. But almost no one knew Ben Solo anymore.

Rey is just as rough with Kylo as he was with her, too impatient to be anything else. Her nails leave red streaks as they drag down his bare chest, just enough pressure to make him hiss and throw his head back. His pants are more difficult, what with the pressure from his hardened cock.

Her mouth waters to look at it, but she’s too needy to wait. As soon as his pants are to his thighs, Rey clambers atop him and takes him into her body.

They both moan at the drag of skin on skin, even as wet as Rey is. Kylo isn’t small by any means, and Rey loves the burn of the stretch as she gets used to him once more. She lets herself go, doesn’t bother to _think_ anymore as Kylo’s hands grasp her hips and guide her movements.

Kylo grits his teeth and braces his feet on the bed for better leverage, holding her hips as he begins to take over from his position under her. A moan of loss slips from him as Rey lifts completely off of him and glares down at him. He nods wordlessly at her unspoken demand, feeling absolutely wrecked as he lets her take control once more.

It’s the sweetest of tortures, watching her lithe body rock above him, undulating and chasing her pleasure. His hands drift over her flesh, lingering at her breasts. He knows she’s self-conscious about their size, but he honestly doesn’t understand why. They fit perfectly in his hands, the nipples so sensitive he’s utterly confident he could make her come just by playing with them.

He decides to try, later.

One hand drifts down to where they’re joined and a thrill courses through him at the sight of his cock disappearing into her more than willing body. The wetness seeping from her makes things easier when he uses his fingers to play with her clit.

Rey jolts at the first touch, stiffening with the surprise before sinking back down and rolling her hips. Kylo curses as her inner muscles ripple around him, drawing him that much closer to completion.

“Rey,” he warns, breaths coming faster as he tries to hold off.

She hears him distantly, still caught up in trying to chase her own release. Her hands flounder before finally settling in her hair, tugging slightly for the added sensory input. When Kylo’s free hand reaches up to pinch her nipple, tugging and twisting just slightly, Rey stiffens as she plummets over the edge.

She moans Kylo’s name - his birth name - as she does so.

Kylo cries out her name as he follows, barely registering the name she calls out until he’s caught his breath long minutes later. He growls when he realizes he’d practically answered to the name he despised, almost coming on demand when she’d said it.

He rolls away quickly, not allowing for the usual downtime after they’ve fucked. Unable to look at her, Kylo strides naked to the refresher, stepping under scalding water to wash away the lingering doubt and yearning for what can never be.

Rey follows after giving him enough time to cool down. She slips behind him and runs her hands up and down his torso from behind, absolutely loving the way his muscles twitch and tremble beneath her touch. Her breasts rub against his back, the hardened muscle there drawing her nipples to tight peaks.

One of Kylo’s hands grasps hers, dragging it down to his softened cock. The length twitches in her hand as she strokes it, but it’s too soon for another round just yet. Instead, they take turns washing each other, a level of intimacy that they hadn’t reached before now.

Rey pushes down the hope, the thought that maybe this meant more to him than just getting off.

Kylo bites back the flowery words that flow through his mind, instead pressing lingering kisses to her skin as a substitute. He knows that it’s the part of him that is still Han Solo’s son who wants to shower Rey in compliments and adoration.

But it’s Snoke’s apprentice who pushes her back against the wall and falls to his knees before her. His hands skim up her legs and press her thighs apart, bringing one leg up to rest on his shoulder.

He looks up to meet her eyes as he moves closer, delighting in the darkness of her eyes as she watches him hungrily.

 _“Peace is a lie, there is only passion,”_ he murmurs through the bond as his lips trail up the inside of her leg.

“Switch off, nerve burner,” Rey bites out as he bypasses her center entirely and presses his lips to her other thigh, not wanting to hear him repeat the words to the Sith code. She moans as he nips none-too-gently at the insult.

“I’ll show you a nerve burner,” he threatens. A moment later, his lips wrap around her clit, lashing it punishingly with his tongue as his fingers thrust into her abruptly.

Rey cries out, head falling back against the wall as her legs threaten to give way.

Kylo drags it out, backing away every time she gets close, only to drive her to the edge once more. Only when she’s begging for it, fingers gripping his hair tightly as she babbles above him, does he relent. But first…

“Who am I?” he asks, fingers curling inside her and sending her scrabbling for purchase on the slick wall.

“W-what?” Rey questions. “Ben, I don’t-”

He cuts her off with a sharp nip to the tender skin at the bend of her leg. “Say it,” he demands. When she bites her lip to stay silent, he twists his fingers and plunges them deeper, making her cry out as sparks fly behind her eyes.

 _“Say it,”_ he says, more forceful.

“K-kylo!” she cries out, giving in once more.

In reward, Kylo uses every trick he’s learned about her in the last few months to bring her quickly over the edge. She pants above him, refusing to look him in the eye.

After, Rey is subdued as she washes off once more. She dries herself quickly, hurrying into her clothes. She moves toward the hatch of his shuttle, but he blocks her path. “Move. I need to get back.” Still she avoids his eyes, looking somewhere around his neck instead.

“What’s the matter?” He doesn’t _care_ , he tells himself. He just wants to make sure that she’s not going to back out of their arrangement.

“I told you, I have to go,” Rey insists.

Irritated by her refusal to look at him, Kylo grips her chin and tilts her face up to his. Her eyes are overly bright, but she’s not actively crying, which Kylo thanks the stars for. He’s never known what to do with a crying female.

He studies her expression for a long moment before murmuring, “Don’t go yet.”

Instead of any sort of positive reaction, Rey’s face clouds with anger. “Why, so you can get off again at my expense? Fine, but don’t expect me to go above and beyond.” She reaches for the buckle of her belt to begin disrobing once more, but large hands stay hers.

Kylo is...troubled by her words. His brows drawn together, he frowns down at her before pushing her away with less force than he meant to. She barely takes a step back, anger morphing to confusion on her oh-so-expressive face.

“Just...stay. For a while.”

Rey’s eyes flicker over his face, her mind brushing against his. She is apparently disappointed by what she finds - or doesn’t. Shaking her head, she takes another step back. “I have to go.”

Without waiting for a reply, she turns and bolts, using the Force to open the hatch. Her heart thumps in her chest as she runs full-out toward her X-wing. A roar echoes from the shuttle behind her, but she doesn’t turn around.

To her surprise, she makes it to the ship, and hurries to leap into her seat and power it up. Within minutes, she’s leaving the planet, completely forgetting her whole reason for being there in the first place.

*****

She wants to find someplace quiet to _think_ about things, to make sense of what’s happened. But she’s flying through questionable space - its allegiance changes on any given day. Her entire focus narrows to the hyperlane and the radar, keeping an eye out for anything that could spell trouble.

Rey keeps the bond tightly cinched, her mental walls stronger than ever as she panics her way through the eight hour flight. Also worrying is the fact that Kylo had made the trip in _less_ than the six hours he’d promised. His base ship must be closer than she imagined.

But Rey can’t focus on that. She’s broken an unspoken rule. They’ve always parted amiably, or at least not antagonistically.

Running from him like this opens the door for him to chase her.

An hour from the free space housing the new Resistance base, Rey drops from hyperspeed and lets her ship drift while she tries to catch her breath. She also uses the time to reign in the panic, to inch her awareness further and further around her to see if he’s given chase.

Rey breathes a sigh of relief when she doesn’t feel his signature anywhere around her. Instead, she feels his anger hammering at the wall of the bond. She shudders and pulls her power back into herself as she maneuvers the X-wing back into the hyperlane.

Two hours later, she sits at a table in the mess hall and tries to follow a joke that Finn has learned from Poe. She laughs when he delivers the punchline but it’s hollow, and she hopes he doesn’t notice. It takes longer than she cares for to finally be able to retreat to her quarters, thankful all over again that she’s allowed a room to herself.

She strips her clothes, vowing to burn them if there’s any sign of today on them. She needs new ones anyways, has been berated gently by Leia multiple times to simply _ask_ for what she needs instead of suffering in silence and making do.

In the ‘fresher she turns the water up as high and as hot as it will go, hoping to wash away the memory of her weakness.

To her dismay, the memory won’t leave her. His stony face, her breathless acquiescence. It had only been afterward that she’d realized what he’d asked of her, what she’d given him.

She is losing him.

The Dark is addictive, she knows. She’s felt it swirling inside of her, drawn to the fore when she’s in the heat of battle or in the midst of the encounters with Kylo. But Rey is drawn to the Light, revels in the warmth it wraps her in when she taps into it. She tries to share that warmth in small ways, tries to show Kylo what he’s turned his back on.

With this recent encounter, Rey knows that he’s slipped further down the slippery path to Darkness.

Tears slip unbidden from her eyes, easily washed away by the water. Rey hates herself for the hurt she feels, knows that there’s no use for it. It’s not like they’re in a true relationship. They’re lovers and they’re enemies, separate situations that rarely overlap.

Rey lets herself cry for a few more minutes before standing and steeling herself. If Kylo is determined to be Dark, Rey will simply have to be his equal in the Light.

In her sleep, Rey dreams of grey.

*****

Kylo goes the next two months with no word from Rey. He finds himself waiting on tenterhooks, anxious to see her again, to slake his thirst for her.

And yet she doesn’t call.

The ‘troopers suffer for his distraction. He has no compunction in Forcing them out of his way as he stalks the halls of the _Finalizer_. Hux is inching closer to abject insubordination, but he uses other officers to do so. Kylo doesn’t seem to notice or care.

A surprise attack on one of their weapons factories brings them face to face once more. The sight of the pilot placing his arm around her waist to draw her away from the smoking wreckage of a Resistance craft _enrages_ him.

Rey’s head whips around to stare in horror at him, making no motions to remove the pilot’s arm.

Kylo decides to do it for her. His saber twirls effortlessly as he stalks forward and throws his off hand forward to blast them apart. Rey is pushed to the ground, but the pilot flies backward and into a broken wall. His head makes a hollow sound as it makes painful contact with the duracrete.

“Poe!” Rey cries out, scrabbling to her feet to rush to his side.

Another wave of the Force pushes her down once more, holding her there until Kylo can reach _Poe’s_ still form. He sheaths his lightsaber and raises that hand toward Poe. Lightning crackles at his fingertips as he works up the rage necessary to utilize the attack.

That he uses the image of this man’s arm around Rey is something that he’ll think about later.

Just as the lightning leaves his gloved fingers, he sees a blurred form from the corner of his eye. It’s too late to pull the attack, and so he’s left to watch helplessly as Rey darts in front of Poe, taking the lightning into her own body to save her friend the pain.

Rey screams as the electricity courses through her, feeling as though it’s set her on fire. Her muscles twitch uncontrollably as she curls in on herself, her head landing on Poe’s shoulder while she moans with the pain of it.

Kylo’s hand grasps roughly at her arm, yanking her up and around so he can look her up and down. He shakes her, barking, “You’re a kriffing _idiot!_ Why would you do that?”

Rey grits her teeth at the pain - both from the lightning and the shaking - and spits out, “Because he’s my _friend_ and I care about him.”

Fingers tightening painfully on her arm, Kylo stills as his masked head tilts to the side. “You _care,_ ” he says, making it into an insult.

“Of course I care. He’s part of my family.”

Kylo tuts at her. “That’s not very Jedi of you, scavenger. Attachments are frowned upon.”

 _“I’m not a Jedi!_ ” she screams at him, finally coming to her senses and calling to her saber. She’s not proficient with it in her left hand, but it at least has the effect of making Kylo take a step backward and letting her go in the process.

She falls into her usual stance, glaring at him.

Kylo stares at her, standing guard over her fallen friend like a dire-cat mother protecting her cubs. The Dark swirls around her, trying to find a way in, but her Light keeps it mostly at bay. The two opposing forces embrace Rey, melding where they touch and blurring her form slightly. He’s lying if he says he isn’t completely turned on at the moment.

(He’s also lying if he tells himself he’s not just the tiniest bit in love with her, but he doesn’t even entertain the thought.)

Rey’s chest heaves with the emotional and physical toll this encounter is taking on her. She’s tense with the anticipation of a drawn out battle with Kylo. To her consternation, he doesn’t move. She would charge him, but she doesn’t want to leave Poe unguarded while he’s still unconscious.

Her limbs protest their use, muscles seizing sporadically. She winces as the saber dips and wavers but she keeps her grip firm on it.

Kylo’s head suddenly tilts again, as if hearing something she can’t. He speaks, and she realizes that’s exactly the case.

“Understood. I’ll be there momentarily.”

His attention turns back to her and he steps further back. “Until next time, scavenger.”

Rey watches him leave, feeling off-kilter from the interactions. Once he’s gone from view, she deactivates her saber as her limbs finally give way and she sprawls on the ground. This is where Finn finds her an eternity later, yelling her name and Poe’s until she croaks an answering call.

“What happened?” he demands, helping her stand shakily.

“Kylo Ren,” she breathes, unable to say more as her focus is on staying upright. She would love nothing more than to let Finn carry her, but Poe is still unconscious so she locks her knees and draws on the Force to stay standing.

“Are you okay?” Finn asks worriedly as he hefts Poe’s form onto his shoulders.

“He...he used a lightning attack on Poe, but I got in front of it,” Rey admits.

Finn’s face hardens as he nods, having seen such an attack before. The last time he’d seen it, Snoke had used it on Kylo himself. “Let’s get you guys back,” he finally says, keeping his steps small as Rey struggles to keep up.

It comes as she’s lowering herself into a seat on the Resistance shuttle they’d hidden for a quick exit, his voice spiking into her skull suddenly.

_“You should have medical check you over.”_

Rey squeezes her eyes shut and refuses to answer, instead hammering her walls higher to keep him out. It’s becoming harder as time goes on and the bond grows stronger.

When she gets back to the base, she stubbornly bypasses medical and heads to her quarters for a shower, intending to sleep it off after.

She steps from the refresher in just a towel, trudging painfully across the room to her clothes, when she hears the sudden void that encompasses a Force visit from Kylo. It hasn’t happened in quite a while, but she’s not surprised by his presence.

Emotions had run high today, which always has seemed to affect the bond.

He leans against the wall by her door, watching as she painstakingly chooses her clothing. His silence is grating, so Rey pettily draws it out and makes small movements to make her towel shift and draw up to tease him.

“Are you having fun?” he grumbles, adjusting his stance.

Rey ignores him once more. Instead, she finally picks out what she wants to wear and flicks a glance at him before heading to the ‘fresher to dress.

Kylo rolls his eyes at the gesture but stays where he is. He watches her bypass him completely to fall onto the bed, not even bothering with covers. “Did you at least stop by medical?”

Rey finally grunts, wanting him to leave and let her be. He apparently takes this as a yes, as he lets out a deep breath and nods.

He doesn’t try to converse with her anymore, just waits for the bond to sever on its own. Rey pays him no mind, falling into a deep slumber moments later.

*****

It’s another three months before she reaches out to him again. In that time, they’ve given each other new scars, new nightmares, new desires that go unfulfilled.

They both feel the bond stretching tight, sending their nerves haywire and their tempers spiraling. Rey finally breaks after she yells at _Leia_.

She chokes on the words she’s spit at the General, horrified by her tone and the volume of her voice. She shakes her head, fingers trembling as they cover her lips. With tears in her eyes, she runs.

The hangar is full of ships and shuttles, but she beelines for the X-wing she’d taken before. Shaking hands power up the craft as she yanks the bond open and demands, _“Where?”_

Kylo is silent for long enough that Rey pauses her motions, eyes wide and wondering if he’s finally grown tired of their status quo.

He finally answers, directing her to his family holding on Naboo.

Rey doesn’t question it, simply punches the information into the nav and takes off as quickly as she can. She refuses to focus on anything but the flight during the hours it takes to get to Naboo. Once in the atmosphere of the beautiful planet, she lets out a shaky breath and lets her awareness of him seep into her mind.

He’s waiting for her when she lands, wearing only the basest layer of his usual fare. Rey forces herself to breathe normally when he steps closer to help her down, fingers tightening on hers and tugging her closer to rest their hands on his chest.

Kylo surprises her by pulling her closer and wrapping his free arm around her. It’s altogether too intimate, but Rey can’t pull away.

She _craves_ this, his gentle touch and the illusion that he cares.

They stand there for a while until Kylo finally ends the embrace and uses his grip on her hand to guide her into the house.

It’s a magnificent place, ornate and richly decorated. It has been well taken care of since Padmé Amidala’s death, and Rey can tell that she is still much-celebrated by the people of Naboo. Her eyes soak up the surroundings as Kylo leads her to what appears to be a formal dining room, table loaded down with local food.

Rey takes a seat across from Kylo and fills a plate, hoping to distract herself a while longer. It doesn’t work. She blurts suddenly, “I yelled at your mother.”

Kylo freezes for a split second before carrying on with choosing his meal. “And?”

Rey scowls. “I feel terrible about it. None of this is her fault and I took it out on her because of _this_ ,” she says, gesturing between them.

Now Kylo scowls. “Don’t blame me. It’s not my fault you’re as irritable as a rancor.”

“It actually _is_ your fault, nerfherder.”

Kylo’s hand clenches on his utensil, but Rey doesn’t notice, continuing to speak.

“On Starkiller, when you oh-so-rudely barged into my mind.”

“Who’s to say it didn’t begin when you ransacked _my_ mind?” Kylo murmurs, returning to his meal.

Rey sits back with a stunned expression. “I’ve never thought about that.”

“Exactly. Your fault.” Kylo feels smug at the way this conversation has turned out. The smugness fades a moment later when a grape bounces off his chest. He frowns at Rey. “Did you...throw a _grape_ at me?”

“So what if I did?” Rey rejoins nonchalantly. She gasps when he uses the Force to throw a piece of melon at her but quickly raises her hand to catch it and pop it into her mouth, raising a brow at him as she smirks.

The grape that thunks into the back of her head has the smirk turning to a scowl as Kylo grins. Rey is taken aback at his _beauty_ when he genuinely smiles. He must see something in her face, because he jolts from his chair and rounds the table to shove her chair back and pull her into his arms.

Rey’s arms circle his neck readily, tilting her head to meet his questing lips. It’s a more gentle kiss than they’ve shared before, but Rey is lost in it all the same. When Kylo reaches down and grasps the backs of her thighs to lift her, Rey wraps her legs around his waist, secretly reveling in his strength. He walks them to the bedroom he’s staying in, taking his time and plundering her mouth, his hands caressing and gripping the flesh of her bottom.

Like the last time, months ago, he lays her down gently. Unlike last time, he takes his time undressing her now. With every piece of cloth he removes, he covers the naked skin in kisses. Rey gasps and moans, her fingers carding through his hair as her body moves restlessly.

Once she’s naked, Kylo pulls at his own clothes in an unhurried fashion. He enjoys watching her watch him, the fire in her eyes stoking his own desire. Both completely bare, they come together in a press of naked flesh and a messy kiss. Kylo presses his erection against her, but not inside, not just yet.

“Don’t tease me, please,” Rey begs.

“I like teasing you,” Kylo admits, moving down to torture her breasts with his mouth. He’s delighted to find the nipples already stiffened, almost as though they’re reaching for him. He obliges quickly, drawing one peak between his lips as the other is cupped and molded by his hand.

“K-kylo… Ohhh.” Rey thrashes her head back and forth, already desperate for more.

Kylo halts, pulling away from her breast. “Not that. Not here,” he says softly.

Rey moans louder at his words, relief washing over her as she brings a hand to his jaw and whispers reverently, _“Ben_ ,” through the bond.

He loses himself in the act of giving her pleasure, letting the words he’s held back for so long flow forth from his mind to hers. _“You’re so beautiful, Rey. I love your body, every inch of it. Slight yet so strong. I want to count the freckles on your back, kiss every scar.”_

Tears well behind Rey’s closed lids, hearing his sweet words and wishing it was like this all the time. Wanting to give him pleasure, too, Rey reaches down and lightly grips his erection. His hips jolt and he curses, bringing a smile to her face.

_“I love how strong you are, how you lift me like it’s nothing. I love how it feels when you’re inside me, taking me apart. I want to know the story behind every scar you have, so I can kiss it and give you a new memory to associate it with.”_

Rey gasps when he moves suddenly, nudging her thighs apart to settle between them as he stares down at her with his heart in his eyes. She reaches up and tugs him down to kiss her as he presses inside her.

They moan into each other as he slowly moves deeper until he’s as deep as physically possible. They break away from the kiss, foreheads pressing together as they gasp for breath.

“Ben, please,” she whispers, fingers curling into his hair.

Ben - and he is wholly _Ben_ right now - kisses her tenderly and draws his hips away, only to slide back into her so gently and smoothly that she wants to cry. His arms cage her in as he makes love to her. It makes her feel safe and secure as he unmakes her with every slow and steady draw in and out.

Rey wraps her arms around his neck once more, arching her back to get even closer. Ben uses the opportunity to slide his arms under her and hold her tightly to him. Rey wants so badly to confess to him the depth of her feelings, the meaning this holds for her.

Fear and uncertainty stay her tongue, but her body knows and it shows his. It’s in every gasp, every dance of her fingertips across his back, her legs tightening around his hips to keep him inside her.

Eventually, his thrusts grow quicker, harder, as he chases his release. He begins to murmur into her neck, interspersing the words with kisses. “Come on, Rey. Come for me, sweetheart. I don’t want to without you, please.”

His words spark something inside her that flares brightly, tightening her entire body and sending her careening to the edge. They hover there for an eternity, until Rey finally whispers his name hoarsely, like a benediction.

The Force explodes from them as they plummet into their releases together, Ben gritting his teeth as he thrusts once, twice, three times into her and stills, shuddering at the sensation of her fluttering around his cock.

Rey gasps for breath, her vision still white from the powerful orgasm. Ben rests his head on the pillow beside her, bracing himself above with with the arms still wrapped under her. They’re both content to stay just as they are, connected as intimately as possible, until Ben softens too much to stay inside her. He finally rolls away with a groan, landing beside her. He’s unable to stop touching her, though, and lays a hand on her stomach.

His hands are large, he knows this, but it still does something to him to see that the appendage nearly spans the length of her torso with his fingers spread wide. Rey smiles at him and lets her hand rest over his, linking their fingers together.

She can’t help but feel as though something has changed.

They fall asleep like that, lying together with their fingers intertwined.

When they wake, it’s to Rey’s stomach rumbling. She blushes, but Ben simply smirks at her and rises, pressing a kiss to her sternum as he goes to get them something to eat. Rey sits upright and tries to tame her wild hair, desire stirring in her once more as she hungrily takes in his naked body.

He returns with a plate of fruit and cheese, setting it on her knees as he slides into the bed behind her. She leans back against him, contentment filling her like never before.

They share the snack, Rey smiling when Ben holds something for her to eat from his fingers, finding the domesticity of it endearing. Ben enjoys the reactions she has to things she’s never tried before.

But the interlude can’t last forever. As they lay in bed that night, recovering from another round of almost-tender sex, Rey sighs and traces random designs into the skin of Ben’s shoulders and upper back with her fingertips. He’s lying on his stomach between her legs, his head heavy on her belly.

“Ben,” she says softly, “I have to leave tomorrow.”

“Why?” he asks seriously.

“Because I literally left Leia standing there without a word as to where I was going or when I’d be back. I’m sure they’re all worried.”

“Let them worry,” he grunts.

Rey lightly pinches the skin of his shoulder as she smiles. “I’m sure you’re heading back soon, too, right?”

Grumbling, Ben agrees. “Day after tomorrow. I’d actually just arrived when you called.”

Shaking her head at the impeccable timing, she cards her fingers through his hair. “I really do need to go.”

“Come with me,” he offers.

Shaking her head in earnest now, Rey denies him. “No, Ben.”

He launches upright, eyes taking on a wild glaze as he speaks. “Why not? We can make a better future for the whole galaxy. You would be by my side, always. I’ll even let the rebels go if they vow to keep a low profile and not cause any trouble.”

“And if they don’t?” Rey asks, knowing the answer, dreading it, but needing to hear it all the same.

Ben tilts his head at the question. “If they got in the way, I’d have to kill them.”

Rey purses her lips, wanting to recoil from the man she’d felt so close to for the past day and a half. “I would have a very big problem with that.”

Shrugging, Ben blunders on. “I can’t say that I would enjoy it, but that’s just how things are. If I didn’t end them, they would plan - _are_ planning - to end me. It’s war, Rey.”

“And we’re on opposite sides.”

“We don’t have to be. Think about it, Rey. You would be able to learn everything about the Force from someone who knows the Dark _and_ the Light. You could hone your skills against another Force user, instead of training by yourself or with someone who doesn’t understand.”

“But I would be against my friends, my family,” Rey argues. “I can’t turn my back on them, Ben. I know you don’t understand it, but they came back for me.”

Ben shakes his head. “I saw it, in my vision. I _do_ understand, Rey. But I’m offering you a different family. One with me.” His eyes plead with her to choose him, to choose _them_.

Rey bites her lip, not wanting to fight with him. “Can we sleep on it?” she asks, her voice small and hesitant.

“Absolutely,” Ben promises, rearranging them to a more comfortable sleeping position.

As his arms tighten around her waist, Rey lets herself imagine a future where _this_ is the norm. Spending every day with him, letting him train her and teach her. Going to bed every night in his arms.

Once she knows he’s asleep behind her, Rey lets herself cry at the despair of knowing she’ll never have this again.

She knows this because she’s about to leave. Once enough time has passed that Ben’s arms grow lax around her, Rey moves from the bed gently. Ben snuffles in his sleep but doesn’t wake.

She steals around the room and gathers her clothes, hesitating when she grasps his shirt by mistake in the dark. On impulse, she throws it on over her undertunic, folding her outer tunic over her arm.

At the door, she takes a last look back at him, sleeping peacefully. She sends every bit of love and warmth and Light to him that she’s felt over the course of their stay here.

And then she turns and leaves. Tears blind her as she preps for flight, but she can do this in her sleep. As she breaks atmo and prepares for hyperspeed, she feels his sadness and resignation.

 _“I’m so sorry. I can’t do that to them,”_ she sends to him, praying to every Maker she knows of that he’ll understand.

 _“No, only to me.”_ he replies. A moment later, he shuts the bond on his end.

Once she inputs the coordinates and the autopilot takes over, Rey curls in on herself and sobs. She’d been so happy, she’d forgotten that they were at _war_. They’d drawn their battlelines long ago, back when she’d refused his offer in a flaming throne room with bodies littering the floor.

She’d lost her heart to him during that whirlwind of the beginning of the bond.

Now, she just has to forget that she’s lost her soul to him in an opulent bedroom on Naboo.

*****

He knew she was going to leave when she asked to sleep on it. He _knew_ his scavenger. Still, he hoped. But as he listens to her move around the room, he knows he had been wrong.

Ben holds his emotions tightly in check until she leaves, though she almost undoes him with her unspoken message through the bond.

It’s this parting gift that stays him when he tenses to run after her. When he hears the engine on her ship fire up, as he hears her take off.

He’ll have to content himself with knowing that she does love him, that her loyalties are divided and not cemented on the side of the rebels. It still hurts.

He finally lets himself _feel_ as she leaves Naboo’s atmosphere, knows she can feel him because she speaks a moment later.

His response is tinged with heartbreak, filled with sadness and resignation. But Ben knows he has to let her go. It’s her choice, and he knows she would never be happy if he made it for her.

As Ben lays in the large bed where he’d made love to her, fed her, talked with her, he feels empty and alone. He reaches deep inside and holds tightly to the warmth and Light she’d given him before she left. It’s all that keeps him from falling apart.

Hours later, once the sun had risen and filled the room with physical light and warmth, Ben pulls himself from bed and toward the refresher. A shower perks him up some, enough to dress and eat.

As he sits at the large dining table, something catches his eye. He turns and abruptly chokes on his food, slamming his fist into his chest to unlodge the bread stuck in his throat. He gasps for breath once he can freely breathe again, not daring to take his eyes from the blue-tinged figure in front of him.

 _“Grandfather?!”_ he cries out incredulously.

Anakin Skywalker sits in all his pre-Vader glory, a glint of amusement in his eyes as he watches Ben continue to cough. “Get some water, catch your breath. I’m not going anywhere.”

Ben takes his advice, though his eyes keep straying to the Force ghost beside him.

Once he sees that Ben has recovered, Anakin speaks again. “You did the right thing,” he says without preamble.

“What?”

“Letting her go. It was the right thing to do.”

Ben flushes from the tips of his ears straight down to his chest. “You saw?” he chokes out, embarrassed beyond measure at the thought of his revered grandfather seeing him having sex.

Anakin laughs at the look on Ben’s face. “Maker, no. I mean, I saw her leave, but I stayed away for all the...before.”

“Thank the stars,” Ben breathes, trying to get his blush under control.

“Thank Obi-Wan. He keeps a better track of what goes on here, so he stopped me before I could show up in the midst.”

Ben’s head falls forward into his hands, not knowing how to deal with all of this. “Why now?” he begs once he’s somewhat composed himself. “I’ve called to you for years and you never appeared as you are now.”

Anakin shrugs. “You were calling on Vader, not _me_. And, Ben, I’ve never been able to answer you. By the time you began to call out to me, Snoke had you so wrapped up in his will and the Dark that I _couldn’t_ come.”

Ben is floored by the words. “So when I thought it was you…”

“It was Snoke,” Anakin confirmed.

He’d long suspected as much, but it doesn’t give him any comfort to hear his fears confirmed. Ben sits back and ponders what this means.

After a long while, he sighs and slumps in his chair, a hand rubbing over his face as his thoughts drift to Rey once more.

As if he can sense Ben’s thoughts, Anakin speaks again. “Congratulations, grandson, on falling in love and finding your path back to the Light,” the man formerly known as Darth Vader says with a smile.

“How did you do it?” Ben asks. “Come back to the Light, I mean. Luke would never talk about it.”

Glowing brighter with pride, Anakin says softly, “My son saw something in me that I thought long dead. I turned to save his life” He sobers a moment later. “It won’t be an easy path. I died and never had to face the repercussions of my past. You, however, seem very healthy and not likely to keel over.”

“I don’t know if I’m strong enough to resist the Darkness,” Ben confesses, unable to look Anakin in the eye.

“Ben, I don’t think you’re meant to be in the Light. Not fully. Nor the Dark. I think you and Rey are the beginning of a new kind of Jedi. Not wholly Light, and not wholly Dark. Somewhere in the middle. Maybe somewhat-”

 _“Grey,”_ Ben says breathlessly. His hand shoves his hair back as he processes this, wanting to think it through and not be impetuous for once. This could be the answer to _everything_ he’s been conflicted about his whole life.

“But how do I convince Rey?” he asks suddenly.

Anakin smirks. “Give her some time. I think she’ll come around a lot sooner and easier than you think. In the meantime, maybe you can start by cleaning up that ridiculous Order?”

“Yes! Of course! I need to… I gotta…” Ben stands, stuttering and stumbling in his hurry.

Anakin laughs and waves him off. “Go. Plan. I’ll be here if you need me, as long as you let the Light in.”

Ben hurries back to his bedroom and sits at the desk there, yanking stationery from the drawers as his mind flies with possibilities.

He has a lot of work to do.

*****

Rey composes herself by the time she returns to the Resistance. She’s still wrapped in Ben’s shirt, but she reluctantly pulls it off and dons her own clothes, tucking Ben’s shirt into her belt.

Leia is waiting for her when she lands and taxis the X-wing into its place in the hangar.

Rey bites her lip and steels herself for this confrontation, but Leia simply pulls her into a tight hug. It makes Rey feel worse than when she’d yelled at the older woman.

Leia pulls back and looks closely at her. “Are you okay?” she finally asks.

Rey feels her eyes burn with tears, but she nods and grasps Leia’s hands, wanting to let the woman know how much Rey appreciates her.

“I’m sorry about the other day,” Rey whispers.

“Oh, Rey, I’m not upset about that. Tensions run high in times like these. Sometimes you just have to get away from it. I’m just glad you’re safe.”

Rey nods, overcome. Leia smiles at her and tucks Rey’s hand into her arm to lead her inside. They pass by handfuls of Resistance fighters on their way through the base, everyone greeting Rey by name. She blushes at the notoriety.

Once they reach Leia’s office, she gestures for Rey to sit. “Do you want to talk about it?” she finally asks the younger woman.

Rey shakes her head minutely, then pauses and stares hard at Leia for a long moment. She comes to a decision and blurts out, “I’ve been seeing Ben.”

Leia stills, her eyes closing in pain. “I wondered when you would tell me.”

“You _knew?_ ” Rey is gobsmacked at Leia’s words.

A tight smile crosses Leia’s weathered face. “I have _some_ training in the Force. You think I wouldn’t recognize my own son’s presence?”

“But...he’s never _been_ here, not physically. And I try to only speak to him through the bond when I’m off-world. I’ve been careful!” Rey assures the General.

Leia laughs at Rey’s panic, not unkindly. “Rey, I can sense his physical presence attached to yours. I’ve known since Crait whenever you go see him.”

“You’re not mad?” the young woman asks timidly.

“Honestly? I’m just glad he has something to focus on, something that may draw him back from the Dark.”

Rey winces at this and goes on to tell Leia of the conversation that had finally driven Rey from Ben’s side. Leia takes this in stride, nodding serenely.

“You’re taking this exceptionally well.”

“I’ve gained some sense of calm in my old age,” Leia jokes. “Don’t worry about it, Rey. Focus on yourself for a while, take a few days off training and just catch up with your friends.”

“Thank you, General.” Rey leaves the mother of the man she loves, heading first to her quarters.

After such a long trip in the cramped X-wing, Rey just wants to shower and sleep. She tugs on Ben’s shirt once she’s dry, pulling the collar up to her nose to draw in his lingering scent. She falls asleep to the ghosted memory of his arms around her and a patch of tears on her pillow.

*****

Ben spends the rest of the night scribbling on multiple sheets of paper, crossing out and underlining and trying to make sense of everything in his mind.

His first thought is to simply disband the First Order.

He realizes this is a stupid idea as soon as he remembers Hux. The ginger thorn in his side would grasp control of the situation as soon as Ben turns his back, so that idea is discarded quickly.

His next idea is to make it into a legitimate monarchy, with himself as king or emperor or whatever title would work out. The memory of how Emperor Palpatine had used such a position to eventually terrorize the galaxy made this plan fall to the back of the line. If he could be a _good_ monarch, he had no doubt it would be a positive outcome. However, he had no such faith in himself.

And, honestly, Ben was tired of leading.

This realization had led to his latest idea - an oligarchy. He could -possible along with his mother - oversee a group of leaders who would have equal power. It was by no means perfect - corruption was everywhere, after all - but it was a start.

He begins to write down names of First Order officers who may be a good fit for such a position. Many are too cruel for such power, but Ben finds that he has more than a few good candidates. By the time morning comes, he’s used up two full pads of paper and has a pile of crumpled sheets surrounding him.

He doesn’t have time to sleep before he leaves, but it doesn’t bother him. He’s gone much longer without sleep. Instead, Ben settles onto the floor and decides to try something he hasn’t done in years.

He opens himself up to the Light.

It takes a while for him to push past the Darkness that prowls in him, but the reward is worth it. The peace that comes to him as he reaches out to the Light is overwhelming. He doesn’t realize that tears have begun leaking from his eyes until an hour later, when they’ve dried to salty tracks on his cheeks.

Ben feels revitalized and centered in a way that he hasn’t felt in years, if ever. He no longer feels so conflicted, though it is odd to feel both sides of the Force flowing in his soul.

For so long, he’d associated the Light with weakness, with fear. But Rey had shown him that he was wrong. She’d given him the strength to want _more_ than what he’d contented himself with for the last decade.

Now he simply has to work for it. He wants to _earn_ his redemption. (Not that he thinks he really deserves it, but he desires it in any case.)

As Ben readies his shuttle for flight back to the _Finalizer_ , he steadies himself and tries to grasp the mindset he’s been working with for so long.

He’s never been more thankful for his mask. He knows that his face is terribly expressive and that would spell disaster for his plans.

For this to work - for things to go in the direction he’s hoping - he’ll have to continue to be Kylo Ren for a while yet. If Hux or any of the higher-ups become aware of his change of heart, it could be fatal.

Ben spends the handful of hours of travel to the _Finalizer_ cementing his plans and resisting the urge to contact Rey. As it had been his choice to embrace the Light, it has to be Rey’s choice to come back to him.

But Ben can be patient in this, of all things. He must be. _This_ will be the future that he’d seen so long ago.

*****

When he reaches the Star Destroyer, he first stops by his rooms to shower and change. His clothes still hold the barest scent of Rey from when he’d held her for the short time they’d both been clothed.

There’s also the missing undershirt she’d stolen from him on her way out. He didn’t begrudge her this - in fact, it sent a primitive thrill through him to imagine her in his clothing - but his thicker outer tunic is scratchy and uncomfortable against his bare skin.

Garbed once more in the full ensemble of Kylo Ren and his features carefully hidden away behind a mask of black and chrome, Ben makes his way to his office. As Supreme Leader, he has access to almost every system from his personal console.

He plans to make use of this little by little, enough to keep Rey and - by extension - the Resistance safely ahead of the First Order. As much as Ben has tried to push away the memories of his younger years, some things are embedded deeply.

The encryption codes to the subspace receiver Han had installed long before Ben was born was such an example. Ben is probably the only person in the galaxy now - besides Chewie and possibly Leia - who could hail the _Falcon_ without the message being traced or decoded.

Ben is banking on Chewie still manning the _Falcon_ in order to receive whatever messages Ben is able to send.

But first, he has to solidify his rule. For months, he’s slacked off of his role as leader, allowing Hux to do what he will with the Order. Beginning today, Ben is taking back control. It will take time to bring his plans to fruition, and he won’t be able to do so unless he has absolute control.

His first order of business is to order reports from the past six months sent to his personal datapad. Hux is very obviously peeved but does as asked.

Ben spends _days_ reading through reports, slogging through inventory and arms counts, headcounts and training reports for the ‘troopers, a list of the current armada and plans for ones to be built. The Dreadnought plans give him pause, but he simply notes it and moves on, planning to question Hux later about multiple things.

When he finally does so, nearly a week after leaving Naboo, Hux is nearly affronted by the question.

“Sir, it is unseemly for the Supreme Leader to go about the galaxy in such a small vessel. You must provide a solid presence, and what better way than to live aboard a ship the size of a small planet?”

Ben accepts the reasoning, though he catches the passing thought in Hux’s mind that the vessel in question is being built to _his_ specifications.

He allows Hux this small victory, knowing that Hux will probably never live to see the completion of the ship.

After a few hours of such exchanges, Ben nods, satisfied. “Thank you, General. That will be all,” he says.

“Very good, sir.” Hux nods sharply - the closest he will ever come to bowing to Kylo Ren - and leaves quickly before Ben can think of something else to ask him.

Alone in what used to be Snoke’s projection room - it has since been converted into Ben’s throne room - Ben runs a hand through his hair and sighs. He’s growing weary of the silence between himself and Rey already, but he stays firmly in his own head. He’ll wait for her to contact him first.

Ben is also staggered by the sheer amount of work goes into running the Order. He’d always assumed Snoke just delegated everything, but most of the operations require signing off by the Supreme Leader himself. As much as he wants to hate it, Ben is grateful for the distraction.

Another distraction comes at night once he’s retired to his rooms. After showering and readying for bed, Ben spends an hour or so meditating. Sometimes, Anakin joins him, or his namesake Obi-Wan.

Luke has yet to appear to him.

Anakin tells Ben this is simply because Luke has yet to grow the balls to do so, grinning at the sharp bark of laughter he startles from Ben.

Between the two Jedi Force ghosts, they show Ben how to find his way back to, if not the Light, at least a middle ground. Anakin is better at this, since Obi-Wan had been firmer in the Path of the Jedi.

Anakin is a kindred spirit in that they both feel emotions too strongly, were too old when taken in by the Jedi Order, and having fallen in love with headstrong women. Anakin laments that Padmé wasn’t Force-sensitive and therefore unable to speak to her grandson as he is able to.

“You’d like her,” Anakin says wistfully. “She knew no fear, didn’t care what happened to her as long as she did her duty to her people or her family. She reminds me a lot of your Rey.”

Ben blushes to hear Rey referred to as _his_ , but silently agrees. Rey is certainly headstrong - stubborn and mulish and so fierce in her protection of her loved ones. He _yearns_ to see her once more, but he remains stubborn in his own right and keeps the bond closed.

As his soul begins to mend and he begins to fully appreciate the depth of his feelings for her, it becomes harder and harder. But as the conflict within him resolves, he grows more certain that he’s on the right path.

It’s going to be a long road, but he’s willing to walk it.

When Anakin looks on him with pride, Ben ducks his head and mumbles about nosy Force ghosts before settling back into meditation.

*****

Rey knows something is wrong fairly soon after she leaves Ben. There’s a subtle _push_ against her senses, and she can tell that something big has happened in the Force. She just can’t tell what it is yet.

She goes two weeks before figuring it out.

It begins with fatigue, which she attributes to the daily grind of being part of the dwindling Resistance.

The nausea follows soon after, her stomach churning at even the scent of her favorite foods. Forget even trying to _eat_ said favorites. She goes three days with the barest amount of sustenance simply because she can’t keep anything down.

Finn catches her when she collapses during training, holding her tightly in his arms and refusing to let her down until he’s deposited her on an exam table in medical. She glares at him for making such a fuss, but she’s honestly touched that he cares so much.

Even after so long with this ragtag bunch that she calls her family, such concern is astounding to her.

After a full exam and being berated by Major Kalonia for skipping so many after-battle checkups, Rey is told that she’s pregnant.

Kalonia is floored when Rey promptly faints.

Leia is called, and she sits vigil by Rey’s bed until the girl comes around. She studies the face of this young woman who loved and was loved by her son, who now carries her grandchild.

She looks so young to have gone through so much. Abandoned, eking out a miserable existence for the next fifteen years, only to be dragged into a fight so much bigger than any one of them.

And now, pregnant and alone in the middle of a war.

Leia sighs and prays for strength and peace.

When Rey wakes, she takes one look at Leia and knows that her condition is not a secret to the General. Tears fill her eyes as the reality of the situation crashes down around her.

She’s carrying the child of arguably the most powerful man in the galaxy. She’s abandoned the father of her child. Said father is her sworn enemy in a war that’s not looking to end any time soon. And she’s completely and utterly in love with him.

Leia rubs soothing circles in Rey’s back as she sobs, turned to her side so she doesn’t have to face Leia.

“Rey, it’s going to be alright. This isn’t ideal, but we’ll make do and come out of this on the other side.”

“H-how can you be so _positive?_ ” Rey hiccups through the tears.

Leia smiles and squeezes Rey’s arm gently. “Well, I just found out I’m going to be a grandmother. That helps my feelings on the matter.”

Rey chokes a laugh out and turns to face the other woman. “I don’t know what to do,” she whispers.

“First things first, do you want to keep the baby?” Leia smiles at Rey’s shocked expression. “It’s a terrible situation, I’m not going to lie. So you can take charge of it and end the pregnancy now, before it’s too late, if that’s what you want.”

Rey chews her lip, looking down at her hands. She wrings them together while she thinks, finally asking for more time to think. Leia easily agrees, gently suggesting she talk to her close friends for more opinions, if she wishes.

As Leia leaves, Finn and Poe rush in. She’s glad that Rey will have some support if she decides to continue the pregnancy, though she wishes with all of her heart that Ben were here to be that support.

Rey hesitates to tell her best friend about her condition, but she does need advice. She had never imagined herself becoming pregnant. On Jakku, expectant mothers were a rarity. Either the harsh conditions and lack of resources caused the pregnancy to fail, or the mother perished soon after the birth, unable to scavenge and therefore eat.

To be carrying the child of Kylo Ren is another factor she’s uncertain about. The majority of the Resistance, she knows, would label her a traitor and a whore for going to him.

No one understands, though, the connection they have. She _knows_ that Ben still has Light in him, that he can come back to them. Only recently has Rey accepted that it’s not something she can convince him of. Ben has to turn back by his own choice.

As she sees the worry and concern on Finn’s and Poe’s faces, she knows she can’t keep this bottled up for long.

“I… I need you to sit down, Finn,” she says finally.

He frowns but does as she asks, tugging over a chair and sitting next to her, grasping her hand lightly in both of his. “Are you okay?”

Rey laughs bitterly, going with blunt force instead of drawing it out. “I’m pregnant.”

It takes an eternity for her words to sink in. When they do, Finn goes ashen as his grip tightens. “Who was it, Rey? Do I need to kill anyone?”

Rey almost laughs again, but she sees that he’s entirely serious. She shakes her head, laying her free hand atop Finn’s. “It wasn’t like that, Finn. Nobody forced me. It was...an ongoing thing that ended a few weeks ago.” A frown pulls her brows together as Rey calculates the timing.

“Actually, I think that’s when...it happened,” she says awkwardly. When she chances a look at Poe, he’s staring at her in sudden realization. Her eyes widen in fear of his reaction, but he surprises her.

He smiles. “Maybe she wasn’t wrong all this time, after all.”

Finn turns to ask what he means, but Poe simply reaches over and gently runs his hand over Rey’s head. “You can’t hide nav coordinates from the man who programs every nav system in the fleet, sweetheart. Hell of a place to disappear to.”

Rey blushes and glares half-heartedly, happy beyond measure that he hasn’t condemned her.

“Will someone tell me what’s going on that I’ve missed?” Finn asks suddenly.

“I went to Naboo a few weeks ago, when I disappeared for two days?” When Finn nods, Rey swallows and continues. “I was invited to the family home of Padmé Amidala.”

“But isn’t that Leia’s...mom…?” Realization blooms on his face, and Rey tenses. His horrified whisper nearly breaks her heart. _“Kylo Ren?!”_

Her voice is firm, though, when she bites out, “The father of my child is _Ben Solo_.”

“There’s no difference!” Finn cries, disgust in his tone. He abruptly lets go of Rey’s hands to jump to his feet and pace the room. Poe steps forward, ready to come between them if Finn does something stupid.

“How could you do this, Rey? He’s a monster!” the former ‘trooper hisses.

Poe sighs. _Something like that_.

“Hey, buddy, calm down. She’s in no condition to get worked up,” the pilot tries to intervene.

It has the opposite reaction, however. “Yeah, because she’s carrying a _Sithspawn!”_

Rey’s face crumples and Poe grows officially angry. “Get the hell outta here, man, before you say something you’re going to regret.”

Finn glares at him and glances at Rey, his glare faltering at the tears running down her cheeks. “Rey…,” he mumbles softly.

“Just go for now. Come back after you’ve both settled down,” Poe advises, gripping him by the arm to lead him out. “And don’t go around spreading the _happy_ news, okay?”

Finn nods numbly and leaves without further fuss.

Poe takes his chair and Rey’s hand in his, smiling up at her as he says, “So, that went well.”

“I honestly expected you to have the worst reaction,” Rey admits, sniffling as she wipes her eyes with her free hand. “You were tortured by him, after all.”

“Nah. I can tell you care about him just by looking at you, Rey. I can’t believe that you of all people would be able to feel that strongly for someone who’s unredeemable.”

“What am I going to do, Poe?” Rey asks softly, new tears replacing the ones she’s just wiped away. “I don’t even know if I’m going to keep it.”

“Well, that’s your second hurdle. For now, focus on coming to grips with the news. Never make an important decision when you’re emotionally compromised.”

Rey laughs. “I see the General has been teaching you.”

Poe ruffles his hair with his free hand. “Yeah, she’s been making me sit in on meetings and stuff. Keeps telling me that _someone_ needs to know how to run things if anything happens to her.”

“Thank you, Poe,” Rey says sincerely, gripping his hand tightly.

“Anytime, Jedi girl.”

*****

The first transmission to the _Falcon_ has the coordinates of a shipment of First Order supplies that were meant for the ‘troopers stationed on various Imperial planets. It’s accompanied by two letters: _B.S._

Ben hopes the Wookiee doesn’t simply delete the message, as it’s quite a large shipment and would go a long way toward helping the Resistance. In any case, he’s done what he can for the moment in that vein.

He’s been working on his other plan, feeling out the few names still on the list of potential candidates for future leadership, crossing off a few after careful browsing of their minds. He has high hopes for the ones left - a General who’d only recently been promoted, a Grand Admiral who had been in the position since _before_ Vader, and a Lieutenant whom Ben had caught some very forward-thinking ideas from during meetings.

The fact that the Lieutenant was a woman didn’t help her in being heard with her ideas.

Ben had long been taught that gender was no indicator of capability. The majority of his Knights were female, and they regularly held their own against him in training and mock battles.

It had crossed his mind to have a mixed oligarchy - made up of First Order _and_ Resistance officers. Maybe a few planetary politicians mixed in, perhaps at a lower level or as an advisory board.

In any case, he had been subtly shifting the status quo. He’d introduced the idea of a reward system for the ‘troopers to inspire more loyalty, one he’d actually put a decent amount of thought into. As opposed to _reconditioning_ , it would implement a demerit system. After so many demerits, the ‘trooper would be demoted or sent to a different unit.

The rewards came in the form of less on-duty days when a ‘trooper earned credits as opposed to demerits. Ben plans to add in more rewards eventually, but for now it doesn’t matter.

The idea is summarily dismissed by the majority of the council.

Ben is happy to see that those who are still on his list were in favor of the new system. He isn’t bothered by the failure of his plan, though he can sense Hux’s glee at the situation.

The point had been to test the waters.

He feels confident enough to mark the three candidates as a given once he overthrows the current regime. From here on out, it’s simply a matter of weakening the Order from the inside.

He begins with sending more transmissions to the _Falcon_ , taking hope from the fact that every few weeks, a new shipment is ransacked. The Resistance is smart to pick and choose which ones to target. There’s no given pattern, but the pilots and soldiers are always left alive afterward.

Ben is more thankful for this than he’d thought he would be. He’s beginning to realize that he’s had enough of battles and bloodshed.

Another way he’s weakening the Order is to seed dissention within the ranks. It begins with a few ‘troopers - a subtle push of malcontent and rebellion. He’s shocked when four full companies defect.

The shock is followed by _glee_ that this is working.

Of course there are setbacks. The shipments become harder to target due to heightened security. He receives reports of his father’s ship coming close to those shipments, only to escape capture.

He hopes Rey isn’t putting herself in danger.

Hux nearly catches him sending a coded message telling of a little-used base that may hold something of value to the Resistance. He’s looking at the specs of the base when the General breezes into his office without knocking, his calculating gaze studying Ben closely.

Ben nonchalantly turns the datapad off, making no moves to hide what he’s looking at. “Is there something the matter, General?” he asks dismissively.

Hux’s face draws tight in distaste. “We’ve got a problem,” he finally says.

Ben leans back in his chair, turning to fully face the ginger man. “What kind of problem?”

“I believe we have a leak, sir.”

“A leak?”

“Yes. I’ve noticed an alarming amount of our shipments are being attacked and ransacked. I fear there is a mole somewhere in our midst.”

Ben grows pensive, pretending to think on the matter while he’s in honesty simply trying not to laugh. He finally returns his attention to Hux. “Perhaps we’ve grown too predictable. Is there any way to change the shipment routes?”

“It will take some time, but yes.”

“Good. Do so. Report back to me before you send anything on the new routes. We’ll plan a trap if possible.”

Hux positively grins at the idea. “Yes, Supreme Leader.”

He’s too distracted by his own ego and malice to see the expression on Ben’s face.

Ben smiles serenely. _It’s almost time_.

*****

Rey has never been so uncomfortable in her life. Huddled in her AT-AT abode, sleeping on rags and scraps and shivering for warmth in the frigid desert nights, had been more comfortable.

She rolls to her other side, groaning at the shifting weight of her abdomen and the baby inside it.

Her fingers dance across the expansion of her stomach, marvelling once more at the sight. Leia has told her that she’s barely showing for as far along as she is, though she’s reassured that this is normal with a first-time pregnancy. At four months along, she can still hide the bump with a loose tunic and her belt low on her hips.

When the baby shifts and lands squarely on her bladder, Rey winces and shifts enough to pull herself upright and head to the refresher.

After, she slides back into bed, tugging at Ben’s shirt to give her belly more room.

It had been a given, really, looking back. She had decided within a few hours that she was keeping the baby. All it had taken was visiting Leia’s office and seeing a framed picture of the General, Han, and Ben when the latter had been a young child.

The dark, curly hair and too-large ears poking out from the strands had cinched it for her.

She wonders if their child will have his eyes, her nose, his _height_. She pictures all sorts of combinations of their features, each more lovable than the last.

Her only wish was that Ben knew about the child, would be part of its life.

He still held his end of the bond tightly closed. Every once in a while, she would feel the barest brush of his emotions, but she was careful to keep her own mental walls high.

She wasn’t sure why, but Rey was convinced that knowing of the baby would put Ben at risk. Nothing Leia nor Poe nor even Finn said could change her mind. She refused to put him in danger, even now.

But she has _hope_.

For months, almost since she’d left him on Naboo, Ben - or so she assumes - has been sending them bits of information. Travel routes of shipments of food, bunkers of weapons and ships, even an abandoned base that they’d commandeered for a few feeks.

Always, the transmissions were accompanied by the letters _B.S._

This is what gives Rey her hope. While others argue about defunct code words and trickery, Rey knows in her heart that this is Ben. She feels so proud of him that she can barely stand it sometimes.

Leia is cautious in her optimism, and Rey understands her reticence though she doesn’t share it.

After news of her pregnancy had made the rounds of the current base, speculation had run high on who the father was. Poe and Finn were both top competitors for most likely, which amused Rey to no end. A few pilots she’d spoken to once, a maintenance worker who smiled at her, and even a few strangers were also in the running.

Rey had finally grown tired of the outlandish stories of how she’d ended up pregnant and decided to tell the whole truth. She had walked into the mess hall to hear the tail end of a theory where Poe _and_ Finn had been a party.

The rest of the table had gone silent, which the storyteller took as a prompt to speak more.

When he finally noticed the wide eyes focused on something _behind_ him, his words had trailed off as he’d turned.

“Please,” Rey had snarled, one hand on her belly, “tell me more of how my _best friends_ got me pregnant.”

She’d glared around the room and come to a decision. Her back ramrod straight, she’d stood tall and asked rhetorically, “You want to know who the father is?”

“Rey, you don’t have to-” Finn had begun, reaching for her.

“No, Finn, it’s time the truth came out. The _real_ truth. Is everyone listening?” she’d yelled. “The father of my child is _Ben Solo_.”

Gasps had echoed around the room, but Rey was already on her way out.

For weeks after, Rey had been avoided like she had the Bandonian Plague. She tried not to let it bother her, but she winced at the whispered insults and even more speculation. Her moods had dipped drastically, ending with her in medical because she wouldn’t get out of bed.

Rose was a constant visitor, and she dragged several of her friends with her to cheer Rey up. Slowly, others began to visit, apologizing for their harsh words and insensitive gossip.

Now, months later, she’s accepted that some would never accept her or her child, though they were the minority.

Her family are the only ones who matter to her, and they love her regardless. She’s told them all of the bond between herself and Ben, though she keeps bits to herself - things that are too special to her to share.

Rose finds it all very romantic, and Poe shares some of her enthusiasm. Finn is still decidedly against Ben, but supportive as can be for Rey.

Leia visits her every day, lays a hand over her belly, and feels with the Force. Rey knows the older woman worries for this child as she had for Ben, is looking for any sign of the darkness that had haunted her only son even in her womb.

Rey doesn’t reassure her that Snoke is dead, that the baby is safe from his influence. She simply smiles and lays her hand over Leia’s, thankful beyond words that her child is already so loved.

As Rey lays in bed now and feels the baby move, she smiles and sends a tendril of the Force to the tiny being inside her. Tears unexpectedly spill from her eyes as she feels the movement in her belly increase at her touch.

How she wishes Ben could share in this…

Almost as if the universe has granted her wish, an alarm begins to blare throughout the base. A panicked voice comes over the overhead speakers.

“First Order Star Destroyer sighted in orbit! They’re heading straight for us! Everyone to your battle stations, quickly!”

Rey is on her feet a moment later, tugging on her clothing. Even as small as her belly is, Rey has been forced to get larger pants so that they’ll slide past her hips and over the bump. She leaves Ben’s shirt on, simply throwing her standard tunic on over it and buckling her belt low enough on her hips to somewhat hide her pregnancy.

She calls to her saberstaff - constructed only a few weeks ago - and hurries to find Leia.

The General is sitting in her office, her head in her hands.

“What’s going on, Leia?” Rey asks as she comes closer.

“It’s Ben’s ship,” Leia says, heartbreak in her voice. A moment later, she steels herself and stands to her full height. “We need to evacuate. There’s no way we can take on a Star Destroyer with what we currently have. And _you!_ You should be as far away from the battle as possible.”

“Leia, I’m sorry, but no. I’ll hold them off while the rest of you load up.” When Leia opens her mouth to argue, Rey smiles and lays a hand on her belly. “I have a trump card.”

“Rey, that’s exactly why I can’t let you do this. I won’t put you or the baby in danger.”

“You’re not. _I_ am. I believe in him, Leia. He won’t hurt me.”

Leia studies her for a long moment before her shoulders sag. “Very well. But Black Squadron will be standing by to give you cover, just in case. No arguments.”

Rey smiles and hugs Leia tightly. “Thank you. I’ll see you soon,” she promises before hurrying away.

As she stands in the doorway of the gate - reminiscent of the gateway on Crait - Rey tentatively opens the bond on her end.

It’s been so long that she almost doesn’t know how to deal with the sudden influx of _Ben._ He’s out there, coming fast. Rey watches a large command shuttle land a few hundred yards out, followed quickly by several more.

But it’s only when she sees the black figure step out that Rey steps forward as well.

She walks with purpose, her unhurried steps bringing her slowly onto the bare field outside of the front gates. She comes to a halt within shouting distance, settling into her favored stance as both ends of her staff ignite.

She feels Ben’s surprise at her weapon, followed by his absolute _joy_ at seeing her again, even across the battlefield. She doesn’t bother to hide her own joy from him, nor anything else.

As a ginger-haired man joins Ben at the fore of their forces, she can see the moment he realizes.

He had turned to speak to the other man, only to freeze. A moment later, his head whips around to face her, his shock reverberating through the bond. Rey grins and weaves her weapon around to hold it at an angle behind her, allowing the wind to buffet her front and showcase the slight bump there.

 _Now what, Ben?_ she asks herself.

*****

Ben is woken up at an ungodly hour by an ecstatic Hux, babbling about how they’ve found the Resistance.

Instantly awake, Ben listens carefully to Hux’s words. The Resistance has taken up residence on a Mid-Rim moon, Wasskah, and have no idea that the First Order is within striking range.

Ben frowns, but soon rises and tells Hux to gather six squadrons and meet him in the hangar. He dresses quickly before hurrying to his office to send a warning.

Before he can make it, Hux appears, and Ben is forced to bypass his office in favor of keeping Hux close. As they enter the moon’s atmosphere, Ben wonders how anyone has managed to live here. While the planet itself has a breathable atmosphere and the forested terrain is quite pretty, he’d been under the assumption that it was under the rule of the Trandoshans, who hunted other sentients for sport.

As they land near the base, all other thoughts fly from his mind.

 _Rey_.

Ben stays inside the ship for a long moment, gathering himself, before heading outside. He stands at the bottom of the ramp and watches her small form become larger as she comes closer. He can feel her mind brushing his gently, which nearly sends him to his knees. He’s overjoyed at the contact, and he’s sure it seeps through the bond.

When she activates her saberstaff, Ben nearly jolts in surprise, though he can see how the weapon suits her. It’s almost an extension of herself, more so than Anakin’s lightsaber had ever been.

Brushing against her mind, he catches glimpses of her wielding a long staff on Jakku. As he turns to speak to Hux, he catches something else. He freezes at the touch of a new signature against his, whipping around to stare at her.

She moves, the saberstaff behind her now and allowing the wind from the exhaust on his ships to blow her clothing taut against her.

She’s _pregnant_.

His first reaction is _pain_ , an ache in his heart that she’s moved on so quickly with someone else while he worked so _kriffing hard_ to make it back to her.

 _“Idiot. Whose else’s would it be?”_ she asks him through the bond.

A possessive growl leaves him at the thought of anyone else touching her, the sound made all the more menacing by the voice modulator in his mask.

 _“Of course it’s yours, Ben,”_ she soothes softly. Her hand drifts tenderly over the bump before she shifts again into a defensive stance.

Ben is hollowed. He can’t hear anything but the roaring in his ears.

It takes a moment to realize it’s a real roar - Hux is bellowing at the gunners to fire upon Rey. He can see her tense in preparation.

Before he knows what’s happened, his saber is in his hand, blazing red and wavering chaotically like his emotions.

Hux makes a choked sound before the two halves of his torso separate and land in a heap on the ground.

The ‘troopers around him watch him warily, but none make a move to fire. Ben quickly calls the command to stand down, sheathing his saber as he stalks forward.

His long legs carry him to her side much quicker than hers could have carried her to him. Her staff is on her belt when he reaches her, one hand cupping the back of her head and the other resting gently on her abdomen. Their foreheads touch as they let the bond open more fully.

Rey feels tears fall from her eyes as she feels how much lighter Ben’s soul is, how much he’d healed in the months they’ve been apart. The Light and the Dark move almost harmoniously within him.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” he demands in a whisper.

Her hands clutching at his clothes, Rey whispers back, “I had this terrible feeling that it would put you in danger.”

Ben sighs. “You’re probably right. I would have dropped everything and come to you. But I had a plan.”

“A plan?” Rey echoes, pulling back to look at him.

Ben smiles hesitantly.  “I’ve been slowly weakening the Order from within. And sending those transmissions. And planning for a balanced leadership after the Order falls.”

Before Rey can answer, a commotion from behind Ben draws their attention. There seems to be a divide within the ‘troopers, some removing helmets and throwing down arms while others are taking aim at Ben and Rey.

Ben steps in front of Rey protectively, which she appreciates even though it’s hardly necessary. They watch in silence as the ‘troopers who are aiming at them are swiftly taken down by the others.

“What just happened?” Rey asks, confusion on her face.

“I may or may not have been influencing rebellion in the ‘troopers as well,” Ben admits. “I didn’t think this would happen, though.”

The two Force users are approached by a handful of higher-ranking ‘troopers, who dip their heads at them. “Supreme Leader, what do we do now?”

Ben hesitates for a moment. “Call the _Finalizer_. Have General Rayf, Grand Admiral Novar, and Lieutenant Auren brought to me.”

The ‘trooper nods, and the group hurries away to do as he’s bade.

Rey turns back to Ben and wraps her arms around his waist. “I missed you,” she says softly.

Ben returns the embrace, leaning down to kiss the top of Rey’s head. “I missed you, too.”

“I’m so glad I was right about you.”

“Oh, yeah? And how is that?”

Rey grins, though it’s hidden by his chest. “I knew you would turn.”

“Don’t rub it in, scavenger.”

*****

It takes _weeks_ of negotiating, back and forth between the remnants of the First Order and the Resistance, before a final draft of the treaty is made.

There is to be a governing body, one made up of a group of people from differing backgrounds - Ben’s candidates accept and are vetted, as are Leia’s eventual choices. Rey insists on allowing people of lesser means to have a place on the board as well, knowing all too well how those planets deemed unfit for takeover were often ruled by bosses like Plutt.

It takes months before the upheaval begins to settle. Even there, there are pockets of dissenters who argue that the current solution is no better than the Galactic Republic. Leia has made sure, however, that no one member of the governing body can have more power than any other.

It’s touch and go, but it seems to be working.

The First Order has pulled out of all the planets who wish them to leave. Some planets - especially those who had suffered from pirating - allow some troops to stay on-world for protection.

Finn has become something of a legend to the Stormtroopers. He’s approached daily by wide-eyed ‘troopers who want to simply be near him.

He finds it all incredibly embarrassing, but everyone else is fairly amused by it.

Ben is instrumental in cementing the reign of the new government. His Dreadnought - finally finished, after rehashing the plans in certain areas - will continuously patrol the galaxy as a show of heavy force.

He’s okay with this. Leia whispers to Rey that he’s always had a flair for the dramatic.

Rey laughs as she agrees, but her heart warms at the sight of him smiling at her from across the room.

Ben has taken to his role as unofficial warden of the galaxy much easier than he had taken to being Supreme Leader.  “There’s much less paperwork, for one thing,” he tells her one night as they lie together in his bed. “I will not miss that.”

“What will you miss, then?” Rey questions,her hand trailing over his chest.

Ben smiles and grasps her hand, drawing it to his mouth so he can kiss her fingertips. “I have everything I need right here. What’s there to miss?”

Rey bursts into tears, but she waves him off and settles after a moment. “Sorry,” she hiccups. “Hormones. I cry at _everything_.” Disgust at herself colors her tone, but Ben quickly slips down the mattress until he’s even with her belly.

“I’m so happy, Rey,” he says softly. His lips are heated against her skin as he kisses as much of her belly as he can. “I love you so much.”

“I love you, too,” Rey returns, blinking quickly to stave off more emotional tears.

Heat suddenly trails down her spine when Ben’s lips drag over her hip bone. She shudders, a reaction that Ben picks up on immediately. He repeats the action, grinning when Rey’s breath catches.

“Do you…?” he begins, unsure how to ask for what he wants.

They haven’t had sex since they’ve been reunited, but not for lack of desire. Rewriting the laws of the galaxy and making sure that everyone was complying with them was a harrowing business, and it didn’t leave much time to reacquaint themselves with each other.

Now though, they have nowhere to be.

They’re in the bedroom they’d shared on Naboo, where Rey was fairly certain the baby had been conceived. An unofficial vacation before the baby arrives, before she and Ben begin to travel the galaxy.

They’ve found balance within themselves, within each other. They hope to bring that balance to any other Force-sensitives they come across. Not a school, per se, but they’ll be there to guide all who want to learn. They aren’t true Grey Jedi, but something similar.

Rey has found herself within the grey area between Light and Dark. She no longer struggles to keep her intentions pure when battling. She knows that sometimes, lethal force is necessary. She doesn’t have to feel guilty for her passion for Ben, the passion that they share.

She embraces it, feeds it, lets it overwhelm her.

Ben is always there to bring her back down to earth.

But Ben is the one now who is reveling in the passion. His lips continue to tease her skin, and Rey mewls with need as he dips between her thighs.

He teases and tortures for en eternity before rising to loom over her. Rey’s legs part and circle his hips like they were made to fit around him.

Maybe they were.

As he slides into her, Ben can’t help but think that they’re each perfectly made for the other. The Force chose well for his equal in the Light.

Too worked up for anything spectacular, they both find their release quickly. Ben collapses to the side and draws her closer to him so he can wrap his arm around her. “I love you,” he says once more.

“I know,” Rey replies cheekily. She laughs heartily at his expression, only to freeze a moment later.

“Rey? What is it?” Ben asks, worriedly. Under his hand, the muscles of her belly seem to undulate and pulse.

“I think...I just went into labor,” she whispers, going pale.

“Hey, it’s okay,” Ben is quick to reassure her. “Mom is here, and the rest of the ragtag family. We’ll get through this.”

Rey nods, gripping tightly to Ben’s hand. “Are you ready for this?”

“Not a chance. But we’ll figure it out together. Two halves-”

“Of the same whole,” Rey finishes.

She keeps this mantra in her head as she labors, wishing it were over so she could simply hold her child. Ben's presence keeps her grounded, helps her focus on what her body is telling her.

When she finally heaves one last push and feels the pressure suddenly disappear, she collapses back onto the bed. A wail suddenly sounds in the room, and she cries at it, knowing her baby is strong.

“ _Like you,”_ Ben sends through the bond, unconcerned by the tears rolling down his cheeks.

“ _Like_ us _,”_ she corrects.

Leia brings the baby over a moment later, unabashedly crying as well. “Would you like to hold your daughter?”

Rey cries harder as she holds the baby, looking down at the perfect little face she's nurtured under her heart for months. She looks at Ben for a moment, a half-posed question flitting between them. He nods at her and Rey smiles widely, turning back to look at their daughter. “Hello, little Padmé. Welcome to the world.”

“We have so much to teach you,” Ben whispers.

*****

 _There is no dark side, nor a light side,_  
_There is only_  
_THE FORCE_  
_I will do what I must to keep the_  
_BALANCE_  
_There is no good without evil,_ _  
_ But evil must not be allowed to flourish.

 _There is PASSION, yet PEACE_  
_There is SERENITY, yet EMOTION_ _  
_ There is CHAOS, yet ORDER

 _I am the wielder of the flame, the protector of balance_  
_I am the holder of the torch, lighting the way_  
_I am the keeper of the flame, soldier of balance_  
_I am a guardian of balance_ _  
_ I am a Gray Jedi

\--- The Gray Jedi Code

 

**Author's Note:**

> So I couldn't find a way to work it into the fic itself, but Rey's contraceptive implant is fried when she's hit with the lightning. She never went to medical, so it's never discovered.
> 
> I really hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it!


End file.
